Salutations.
My name's Jonan,
I'm an 18 year old with the lungs and liver of a 70 year old.
If by any unfortunate(for you) chance,
you get to know me more intimately,
you will find that I:
am quite the cynical little shit
am rather lazy,that's what everyone tells me anyway.
prefer night so much more over the day that I've made a few owl friends.
experiment with the stupidest things possible and still think I am reasonably intelligent.
have an ectoplasmic look during classes.
change brands of cigarettes as much as a girl changes clothes.
am an asshole in my own right,if you know what's good for you,you won't get close.
have an email address;jonan_yip@hotmail.com.

Misery loves company which is why I'm never alone. Don't say I didn't warn ya.

Singapore is becoming more and more run like a communist country.After gaining control over the freedom of speech,they have now introduced CURFEWS.Apparently,no teenager below the age of 17 can "loiter" after 11 pm.What more a better way than to waste police hours?In addition to their usual tasks,the police now have to perform nannying duties.Maybe in the future we'll be seeing commercials for the Neighbourhood Police Babysitting service.Better yet!Why not open a childcare centre run by policemen?It would be an enriching experience for our Men in Blue.Sooner or later they could even branch out to laundry and pizza delivery.Call 999 to order a super supreme.Buy now and get a free coke.But seriously,come on.Curfews?!Wtf."Stop or I'll shoot you for kissing your girlfriend under a void deck!""Officer,there isn't anything wrong with sitting under a void deck.Is there?""I don't care!It's after 11!You brats need 8 hours of sleep.Off to the gallows with you!".Charming.Singapore is already such a fine city.What a better way to make it more fine than to introduce more fines?They could fine $500 for being outside after 11 pm and $100 for every subsequent hour until 5 am.We would see a very well-fed police force.Satire aside,I'm feeling kind of low.I don't know why.Maybe I'm emotionally defunct.Maybe I have low self-morale.But then again I'm most afraid of losing her.After all,deep down inside,under all the masks,I'm just an insecure bastard.But she makes me forget that.

Peace out,Jon.

"After all,she's my wonderwall."



I am going to fail my common test.-___-



Sorreh.Haven't been blogging lately because I can't really use the com on weekdays.Or I'm just a lazy asscrack.With that aside,I shall recap the past week's events(to the extent of my inexplicably bad memory).On monday...Shit.I can only remember from Thursday lmao.Okay,on thursday we had physics lesson and me and Hanhui were "torturing" Benjamin who was sitting in between us.(I know he likes it actually he is such an SMBD person.)Benjamin was screaming(in pleasure) and yelling bloody murder(covering up his masochist side) all the while a certain Edward Tan was trying to explain The Workings of The Universe with us.Winnie started shrieking and a bit of cussing at us and because we really had never seen a Whale-Crow hybrid before,we started laughing.The most bizarre thing was,she started crying.We were the ones getting called "cheebyes" and yelled at to "shut up cause other people want to study".And we were laughing.Ah well,we ARE mentally disturbed after all.Went for CCA at four,at which Five plus,Mrs Neo asked me where Junguang was.I went up to call him down and guess what?Smart-fuck didn't believe me.Quote:"Jonan you are really a bad liar.Hahaha."THAT'S BECAUSE I WAS TELLING THE TRUTH DUMBFUCK.It took three trips up and down,from the hall to his classroom to convince him.Oh yeah,Mrs Teo was bitch-erizing our class again."You all better pay up your $2.50 for the file or I will send your names down to Mr Ong (overused line of hers)" "Cher,you want to make money then say lar.No need to collect until like that.Go beg for alms can liao."At this particular sentance she got flustered(Wonder if I hit a sore spot.Could she have done this before?"You know I can sue you for DEFAMATION?"Please lah.That line is expected to come from a student.She made everyone stay back and had a bitching session about our class.I think she was born in the wrong era.She would have made a good addition to the Japanese secret police(Kempeitai) as one of the interrogation officers.She could've bored the life out of Lim Bo Seng.Today,I wanted to make my I.C but I couldn't get off the computer.I think I need rehabilitation.By the way.It's a friday night,go out and have fun.^^.Leave me here alone with Sally.That's my computer by the way.

Have a great night out,Jon.



Guess what day it is?No it's not an 11th September kind of day.It's my birthday =X.Woke up at 11.00 am half dead cause of late-night chats with Christine =D.Realised I had an appointment with Weimin,Cassie,Denise and Hanhui at the MRT at 12.Shrugged off the druggy feelings and went managed to pull an excruciating and agonizing effort to get up.I did manage to get up but when I got down from my bed I accidently stepped on the rollerchair and then KANINABUCHAOCHEEBYELAH!Yeah.Met Weimin at the bus-stop.He had this dulan look on his face.Okay so maybe he did wait for me for about half an hour =x.They were already on the platform when we got there but Hanhui wasn't even out of the house wtf.He is such a punctually-devoid person(like me).Queermo.Took the train to Orchard to go shopping for STUFF.We were hyped.We din't find what we were looking for in orchard -_-" and Denis and Cassie went to watch movie at Cine -_______-"""""".So we took the MRT to Bugis.Hanhui kept complaining about the fare.Someone stole his EZ-Link and he had to use Standard Tickets all the way.Wakakakakakkaak.We found what we were looking for and decided to go Tampines cause certain people wanted to see certain people.I met Tine there again but she had to leave for dinner =( .And Weimin dun be so depressed lah.Anyhow,thanks to all those who remembered and wished me for my birthday.Thanks to all those who got me prezzies too.^^ Anyhow,I'll leave it at that.Have a good one,

Jon.



He did it again.Hanhui managed to land us into shit together with him.During recess,while we were on the way to the toilet,Hanhui managed to offend a sec 4 malay boy.Stupid dick.Me and weimin were in the toilet doing our normal shit when Hanhui and the malay guy started bitching each other.He could've cleared up the misunderstanding easily but NOOOOO.He had to show off his BIG BLACK BALLS.And they had a bout of shouting,etc.We thought that matter was resolved but at the last period,which is history there were around 10-15 guys waiting outside our classroom for Big Balls to give him the "Royal" Treatment.Since it WAS history period and the history teacher was being a bitch(always is) and moreover,no matter how big,black or smelly Hanhui's testicles are he is still our friend.So we snuck out of class into the jaws of death(<---referring to Big Balls).There was alot of yelling(vulgarities)/pushing(typical) between Testicle Man and the Malay guy.There was almost a fight(which was what everyone wanted) but some teacher who takes my class for reading broke it up.She looks like kermit the frog btw.Except Kermit has a better complexion.Suay was the word of the day.When we crawled back into the classroom our history teacher managed to spot us(God knows how:she's a blur cock) and Mr Razat walked in at the same time.SUAY SUAY LAH.We got detention.Had to sit outside the General Office and write bloody testimonial.(Brings back fond memories of the past year tho.)M.R said we might have caning but then again,it may be a scare tactic.After that little episode,all the shit that happened worked up an appetite for me.Went to central to buy bubble tea and fries.Not a good combination.Went home feeling sick.Anways,gotta run.Till I blog again,

Jon.