i don't like the drugs(but the drugs like me).
Salutations.
My name's Jonan,
I'm an 18 year old with the lungs and liver of a 70 year old.
If by any unfortunate(for you) chance,
you get to know me more intimately,
you will find that I:
am quite the cynical little shit
am rather lazy,that's what everyone tells me anyway.
prefer night so much more over the day that I've made a few owl friends.
experiment with the stupidest things possible and still think I am reasonably intelligent.
have an ectoplasmic look during classes.
change brands of cigarettes as much as a girl changes clothes.
am an asshole in my own right,if you know what's good for you,you won't get close.
have an email address;jonan_yip@hotmail.com.
Misery loves company which is why I'm never alone.
Don't say I didn't warn ya.
Friday, January 30, 2009
aimless
I am fucking alcohol pumped right now.
I have just hit an extremely frightening realisation.
I am bored with life.
No anger,fury or sadness or excitement.Just a sense of weariness and disgust for the path without direction that I have been wandering on.Those that chill with me should know what I'm speaking(actually whining)about.
I am feeling too tired now,will sign in tmr and chat alright,Jonan.
4:10 AM
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Malaysia,truly Asia.
Hello all.I am so fucking bored with a capital B even though I spelt it with a lower case one just now.I am currently in Malaysia visiting my relatives in some god forsaken area of KL.The upside is that I get red packets,the downside is that it's in ringgit and I'm in Malaysia so ringgit automatically is converted to tobacco products.
I can hear the British American Tobacco company laughing already.
Anyway,bringing my laptop is a huge plus(I do use it for purposes other then porn you know)and I'm getting pretty good at CS(playing with expert bots at least 5 hours everyday).Hotel room's pretty okay lotsa bedrooms(but no cute horny malaysian girls ;P),decent internet connection but I miss SINGAPORE.
I want to celebrate CNY with my friends:gloat while you can cause I'm homesick enough to type this only now.
And somehow it just feels so empty not having someone to celebrate all this festive shit with.And by someone I mean female,cute and having eyes only for me(probably not gonna happen but one can wish can't he).
Ah fuck it I'm off to play 11 more rounds of CS,visiting some backwater village tommorow.
I hope I don't get attacked by a rabid chicken and come down with a different strain of flu.
Mandarin oranges,red packets and gong xi something or whatever you people say during Chinese New Year to all of you.
Have a good night,over and fucking out:Jonan.
11:52 PM
With friends like these...
Me and ruben were chatting on msn about relationships and this came up.
Ruben:Hey you heard of the show Changing Spouses?
Me:Yeah,why?
Ruben:Well,I was thinking,imagine they create this show about this guy who fucking loser got no girlfriend before or don't have relationship in a long time...
Me:What the fuck do you mean by that?Fuck you la cheebye!
Ruben:What?Nothing la,let me continue.Then the guy go to like Katong Convent school study for one week.Like send
YOU go KC like shiok ah...
Me:I KNEW IT FUCK YOU LA!
2:44 AM
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
don't tell me that it's over,i'm not used to this temptation.
Fucking brushing the dust off this blog after like what,6 months?(Or maybe more I know to those who will post shit like "10 months la fucknut dunno how to count arh)Have been busy with mundane shit like work,school,drinking and everything in between.(okay maybe not so mundane)Many a time I have come home to drunk to post shit that would irk the living hell out of anyone reading this.(unless you're a cunt like jingyuan who can't comprehend my writings.)
Well,to start things off,I have been doing pretty okay in most areas of my life like love and school.
Okay I lied.
GPA 0.8(Yes enough puns about this please.)
Still no girlfriend.(many potentials but strangely many of them look like they've seen a masturbating cockroach after they've met me,I wonder why.)
Life has not been very kind to me of lately,I wonder if it might be divine retribution.
Nah,I think it's thanks to all the shit I smoke.
Sometimes I honestly start to believe all those pamphlets on smoking stating that it kills our braincells.Examples such as Sheng Bang taking his dad's car out for a spin(yes w/o license of course) to practice parking and going for a little jaunt to Pasir Ris park.Nothing went wrong except for a dented plate,cracked bumper and the engine stalling at a traffic light for 6 minutes.
Oh yeah,some taxi driver seemed to have set his sights on being the next Singapore Idol,stringing together a rap consisting of hokkien,cantonese and malay vulgarities all in one breath when they jumped the red light.We need more capable people like him in Singapore,multi-talented.
Of course it isn't all that bad there're still the little things in life that bring me ecstatic joy(okay i might be pushing it a little on this one)such as getting drunk in class and answering every question with a "HUHHH REALLLY MEHHH."(you have to do it with a japanese AV idol voice.)and playing Left 4 Dead which is a really kickass game.
Mostly because you get to watch your friends fight as a result of playing it.
"ARRRHHH KNN GET THE FUCKING ZOMBIE OFF ME LAA!"
"DON'T WAN'T LEHHH,AN ZHUA(SO HOW?)"
*player 1 walks over and smacks player 2 on the head
"KNN PCB DOG AH YOU, FUCKING AH KUA!"
"GO OUTSIDE SETTLE GO OUTSIDE SETTLE!"
Hmm,it's described as a multiplayer CO-OPerative survival horror game, I wonder why...
Anyways, I'ma gonna head back to my XBOX 360,load in the disc and yell at some people over the microphone(which makes it so fun cause they can't get you unlike in the lan shops wheehee),so good night although it's technically morning but you don't have to be politically correct all the time do you asshole?
Sigh-ing(signing, get it?)off,Jonan.
P.S:I AM NOT A GEEK ALTHOUGH I PLAY GAMES ON THE XBOX AND HAVE A DECENT COMMAND OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE(yes i can hear the "knn si ang moh pai" already.)
P.P.S:NO REALLY,I THINK YOU GIRLS WOULD LIKE ME.DROP ME YOUR CONTACT AND PARTICULARS AT MY EMAIL ADDRESS.PLEASE INCLUDE PHOTO AND CORRESPONDING IDENTIFICATION.OTHER SUBMISSIONS WILL NOT BE ENTERTAINED.
P.P.P.S:ACTUALLY I'M JOKING(yes i am you fucknut who's thinking that i'm thick-skinned to yourself),BUT SUBMISSIONS WOULD STILL BE WELCOME :D
P.P.P.P.S:I wonder how many P's you are allowed to add infront of an S.
12:18 AM