Salutations.
My name's Jonan,
I'm an 18 year old with the lungs and liver of a 70 year old.
If by any unfortunate(for you) chance,
you get to know me more intimately,
you will find that I:
am quite the cynical little shit
am rather lazy,that's what everyone tells me anyway.
prefer night so much more over the day that I've made a few owl friends.
experiment with the stupidest things possible and still think I am reasonably intelligent.
have an ectoplasmic look during classes.
change brands of cigarettes as much as a girl changes clothes.
am an asshole in my own right,if you know what's good for you,you won't get close.
have an email address;jonan_yip@hotmail.com.

Misery loves company which is why I'm never alone. Don't say I didn't warn ya.

"Ow",said my neck this morning,"It hurts when you stay up awake all night till 8.37 am in the morning every day Jonan."

Bear with it asshole,you know the eyes and the brain don't want to sleep yet and I've to put up with it too so quit complaining,I think back to my neck.

"Fuck you." grumbled my neck before went back to sleep in a huff.

This is why I think I'm not normal.(ABSOLUTELY! shout my parents in the background)

So, basically my life has been stuck on a cycle of eat,sleep,train,drink for the past few days.I need something deeper(like a girlfriend hinthint omgplzgimmeanicecuteprettyonewtfbbq*ahem)to fill the void within me.

And yes I know I just made myself sound like a doughnut.

Also recently,I've been getting more annoyed than per normal which already is,pretty frequent.I hate how certain people are getting along so well in life while I am being a stuck jealous whiny little bitch in my room.And my tooth hurts after eating some bread which was obviously baked with glass shards and in a concrete mixer by my beloved mother.

Oh yes,and *they* are banning tobacco products with the words "Mild","Light",etc. Apparently,we teenagers are intellectually crippled enough to think that cigarettes with these words on the packaging are healthier to consume.

That's like saying we'd drink a little turpentine just because it says "Lethal if consumed in large amounts."

Idiot(smokes a half a pack of reds a day):"Ey,I want to be healthier but I cannot quit smoking,how ah bro?"

Shop Uncle:"Ah boy ah,you see this cigarette ah,the name call Mile(Mild)7,then the packet kaler(color)blue blue colour one,less damaging to your health la boy."

Idiot:"Wah uncle, you sure or not?Later my mother beat me again sia,I now use crutches already very difficult eh."

Shop Uncle(thinks to himself,wah cheebye I think your mother kill you before you even get the chance to tio lung cancer sia):"Can one la boy,you see this Mile 7 cigarette ah,the filter so blardy long,the tar must take car to reach your lung ah!You know why this cigarette call Mile 7 or not?"

Idiot:"Um,why ah uncle?"

Shop Uncle:"Because can smoke like fuck la!"

Idiot:"Wah uncle come I jitao buy one carton!"

Shop Uncle:"Ah okay boy,thank velly mush for your bizness ah,support uncle abit ah.You see the packet kaler ah,also good.When you play the computers then your eye pain pain ah,you take out your cigalette then you stare at the packet.The brue brue kaler very good for the eye,uncle everyday confirm stare at the Mile 7 packet one.Then ah,you see the packet also made of recycled paper ah even good for enviroment..."

*HOME*

Idiot:"MA!Come see,I buy this cigarette now I can smoke like free!Uncle say the tar need to take car to enter my lungs sia!They also got no Esso the car cannot move hahaha!I use my pocket money buy one carton see mummy!"

Mother:"WAH CHAO CHEE BYE!"

Yeah we're all like that.

Thanks for the faith and trust in us young ones PAP.

I think I'll go take my tablespoon of turpentine now,Jonan.

By the way,I am a smoker myself and I do fully understand the health hazards(and am feeling some of them now already)of smoking as do most smokers too.

However,I'd like to freedom of choice to fuck up my body as and when I like so I'd prefer the taxes,bans and whatever to go the fuck away thank you very much.

And yes,I know Mild 7 isn't healthier just because it has the word "Mild" in it,thanks for wondering.